HOW FUNNY IT ALL IS.......

Well, I have had several issues these last few weeks with any kind of communicado. Phone, computer, blog, you name it............you'd think Mercury was in Retrograde, but I have a funny feeling, it wasn't.

I haven't been able to write on my blog for reasons unknown, although I think that problem is fixed, tonight.

I thought the problem was fixed last night, and I went ahead and wrote an entire long, passionate blog, and as I moved  my fingers toward the Publish Post, all went blank, and all that was left on my screen was an R.....and an E.......... the rest of my blog had disappeared into the ether's. I have no idea where it went to, and several people have tried to help me find it, but........... again, like a woman taking her car to a mechanic, you have to trust the people that are in charge of this kinda stuff, pay your money, and hope they didn't scam you to death.

Just in case, this gets deleted, I am only writing a short little note, ( my short......anyway), to let you all know that, whether or not  you read this, it does happen to be the highlight of my days, and I never really think......"Who is going to read this?" I write and send.

There are tons of things happening, at least in my head anyway, maybe not so much on the outside, but things, nevertheless, that I would love to share, but I am not feeling so sure about my computer and how this will even be sent, or not sent tonight, so I am going to leave you with this much.

It doesn't take much to make me happy. I am pretty simple. This blog makes me happy, my dogs make me happy, and hmmmmm..............a few more goodies, but I'll save them for another blog.

I'm pretty darn grateful for my days and moments.

There are people that I miss, greatly, and hopefully they will be in  my life again soon............ if not, I learn to chalk things up as, IT WAS WHAT IT WAS, AND THEN MOVE ON.  Always a hard one! Uhh, kind of a big one!

There are so many nuances, so many stories, and moments to share.

Let's just see if this actually makes it to you, untainted. If it does, we'll both hopefully look forward to another blog, about what, we don't know.

Thank you for supporting me, my writings and my journey.

I feel completely blessed..............I really do!

For those of you who I have not seen in quite some time, know that you are missed tremendously, and that I think of you daily............... wishing you were in my life just a bit more.

Enjoy this cricket filled, star lit, windy, warm, beautiful night.

I better get to bed, it is an unusualy early morning for me. I'm so used to nights.............. tomorrow, I'm a day girl.

Love to you all,

Hope this makes it's way to you................

Love,
Gabriela

LOVE...

IS

MY

RELIGION!

ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN.......

If you honestly

want

it

to.

When

there

is

determination

there

are

ALWAYS

ALWAYS

results.

If something

isn't

working

it

just may

mean

Plan A

was

boring

and

plan B

might be

where

the

real

goods

are!

Jump

from

A

to

B.

It's worth

the risk!

BUTTERFLILES, CATAPILLARS, AND SNAKES...OH MY!

Today I headed out for a long, long walk. I woke up a little anxiety ridden, thinking I NEED to do this, and I NEED to do that.

My mind started whirling in thought with all of the should, the shouldn't's and what needs to happen, as opposed to WHAT IS!

I said to myself, "I'm going to have my coffee, love on my babies, and let the day unfold."

Really, all I wanted to do was sit quietly. Usually, then, information, answers, or anything else that I may need to know, comes to me, and I forge on in my day, with surprising information, or guidance that I would have never come up with.

I really do listen. It's no New Age gimmick!! If you truly allow yourself to listen to what is happening in every moment, life, and a sort of guidance, comes along and whispers hints, or clues, or damn near blatant information about what to do in your next moments...... I gotta say though, if you are not listening, truly listening, it will be a big frigin mess and will probably sound and feel all convoluted, and you will be confused or depressed, or both, and the simple stuff that is available at all times, will not be heard because maybe you are too busy trying to fix, or plan, or conjure up a way to make your life just the way you think it should be.

I don't know, that may be the way for you. Really, it may, and it may work, who is to say, really!?

That does not work for me!!

I really believe life is an individual road. What works for me, may not necessarily work for you and visa versa.

I have learned to make plans, and look ahead to sketch something out that I may want, and it is useful, super useful, but my throw in there, is well, I will plan, but I certainly am not going to be attached to any outcome. Why would I set myself up like that? Life doesn't guarantee ANYTHING!  If you think it does, than.....well.......... you think it does.

I don't think life offers anything for sure!

I think our intentions are great, and our aspirations, desires, and plans are just as we want them, but for me, once I let the word out, as far as what I want, I release it, with great hopes, but also know, it may not happen, and someone out there, The Universe, God, or whatever you may deem your Source of love, may, just may, have some different plan for you, or me, and truly, I am up for that. It can seem a bit perplexing, and hard to grab a hold of, but once you get the hang of how it all works, you sort have a little love making session going on, where you give a little, and get a little, and you have to be sensitive to what the Universe is offering, and too, be sensitive to what you want, and meet somewhere in the middle. Of course, remembering what you have asked for along the way, incase you have forgotten, would help you out, but know, is real easy to forget in this chess game!

Well, with all of that, I started out on my walk. I usually take the dogs, but I was going to the store, and knew I would have a back pack full, and really,  just wanted to revel in the day, the weather, and being alone on my day off.

I did start out with thinking like crazy, but as my walk progressed, I became so child like. Honestly, to no surprise, AT ALL!

I got maybe 3 minutes into my walk and after hearing my thoughts, and how boring they were, I naturally melted into my surroundings, and found myself getting my phone out to take pictures of what was before me.

My first stop was a bright red caterpillar. I was so bummed my Iphone wouldn't pick it up clearly. I watched him for a long time. So, so cool, different looking and just plain mesmerizing to me. I left him and then I came upon my sweet horses and donkeys that are right down the road, that I love to see on a daily basis. They make me laugh, and when the dogs are with me, they truly have their own language that makes me stand there in total AWE, watching the interaction between species. Animals really do have a language of their own. It is a seperate, yet extremely important topic of discussion for me. More for another blog.

I know this sounds so corny and whatever-ish, but I came upon so many things that took me to another place and time. I'm gonna name them, cuz I want to, and because it made me so darn excited, more than any, any, any thing, in such a long time!! I saw an amazing butterfly............ it was sucking juice out of a beautiful purple flower. I tried to take a picture but no bueno. I had 10 minutes of sheet amazement. Colors, movements, fragility, and just nature, before me, talking to me.

I saw two snakes. One really colorful, like a salt water fish, but a snake. Again, so mad my  camera on my Iphone wasn't working. Argh!  The other snake was cool, but I don't know what kind, but real different looking and interesting. Didn't look harmful. Then, major cardinals along the way. I mean, I literally was singing to them, and darn if I could remember the tune that, last month, we had down, together, doing this dance that we did, with how they call, and then I repeated it. Oh, well. I tried, but it wasn't the same.

Tons of Road Runners.

Have you ever REALLY watched a Road Runner? And no, I am not talking about the Looney Tunes Road Runner, although, it is pretty hysterical, the correlation.

They are completely spotted, at least this one, who hangs out regularly as if I had Espresso and Croissants  for him every morning.

They have a certain call too. They almost sound like Woodpeckers, but a tad bit different.

I started to feel like a baby, I swear. I was so child like, started skipping and was wondering what was next.

Along the wires above me were birds that were so interesting, I could've stood there for days. I saw different tails, different noises, and movements, but knew they were specific for that type of breed. Next time I bring my binoculars and recorder.

Rabbits were jumping out of the bushes, little babies........... and although I didn't see this guy, there was a deer behind the bushes, making a sound that I know, Oh, so well, and I stood there listening to his....... whatever you call it, his call, his .........well, I don't know what to call it............

A total wonderment ..........

For someone who has very little time off, the time I want to spend, is in...........Nature! It keeps me fresh, alive, innocent, and grateful for simplicity. For the gems that you cannot buy, you cannot succeed to get this kind of stuff......you don't need a degree to be grateful for life, in it's raw state.

My very thoughts were, "Nature, in it's own right, deflects Fear!"

I went from wondering how I was going to figure this out, or that out, how this was going to happen, or that, and it all drifted away, and the REAL REALITY came forth, which, made it easier and more digestible to understand the ABC's of what we need, or have to do, on a daily basis, to live, and be responsible, and privy to what is going on.

When you see things from an objective place, and a real place, it makes it so much easier to move forward and do what you need to do, to move ahead. Nothing really changes, just your perspective.

So much more can happen, and be accomplished, if there is objectivity, and a lightness in it.

Hay, I have tons of things happening in my life, and if it weren't for my days like this, I would probably believe the bogus thoughts that my head drums up.

It is all a bunch of crap!

We deserve precious moments like this! We are so totally innocent and no different than the butterfly, the caterpillar, the cardinal, or the snake, donkey or horse!

My walk really was intoxicating! I dunno, I'm weird like this.

I am so particular with what happens on my days off.

There aren't many hours, and the hours that ARE available are spent with what I love most.

This is one! And.......on top of the list!

Animals.........Nature...............Silence..................

I'm good..........so good!

Grilled some good food.........

I'm ok..............

Life is simple and good!

I JUST WANT TO

...rest

in

the

arms

of

love.

IT'S BEEN AWHILE...

I feel like it has been so long since I have actually written.


For some reason I haven't been able to post things on my blog so I have written, somewhat, but not in the way that I like to. I laugh, because some people have said, "Oh, I love it, it is just short and sweet". Some like the long and thought out, some like the short and sweet. Best of both worlds I guess, so I have had a friend post most of my things for me until the problem gets resolved, whatever that may be.


It seems as if any line of communication has failed recently, whether it be at work, computer, or even phone service.


You would think that Mercury was in Retrograde.


It's not!


I think my life has truly come down to the most bare, bare, bones, and someone out there is wanting to see what I am made of!


I kid you not!


It certainly is a ride, and I almost don't want to write any of this, since I feel not much has changed, outwardly, in a very long time.


Inwardly, I have run marathon, after marathon, with every learning curve you can think of, and then some......... have Surrendered ideas, expectations, grappled with why I know my intuition is always right on, as opposed to what "seems to be", and have had to get a grip on what is real, and true for me!! Not anyone else.


I have ridden the train of "Ultimate Forgiveness", and kept the past, the past, and have stayed so true to the moment that I now believe ones life can be the scariest, but most freeing, tight rope walk there is!


To be honest, those feelings are conflicting now and again, but for the most part, my heart and soul sing of the moment. This very moment!


It doesn't mean that times aren't hard, and trying, and you feel as if things won't get better, but I am learning so whole hearted that even if times DON'T GET BETTER, I CAN ONLY GET BETTER WITH MANAGING TO DEAL WITH THESE THINGS in a conscious manner. One that is forgiving, compassionate, loving toward myself, and others who have maybe played a part in "making my life a certain way", and be done with it.


It can be as short as, IT IS WHAT IT IS, and then you release that, and allow the smaller moments to take over, and become MORE of your reality, rather than the things that tug at your heart, or mind, and there you are again on the mind train that takes you nowhere, but to MORE thinking, MORE heartache, MORE wondering why and how, and why me stuff.


NO! NO.........AND.................NO!


My life reminds me of when I started rock climbing back when I lived in California.


I was so afraid to climb those HUGE mountains and cliffs. My boyfriend at the time was a professional rock climber, and so every weekend we would go to the best places. Joshua Tree.........OH MY GOD............ words cannot express how gorgeous this place was.


So I had never rock climbed before. When he would teach me what I needed to know about the "climb" it would put me into a tail spin because the very same "rules" that applied to rock climbing were the very same "rules" that I had adopted for myself to live by, as a conscious individual, who was yearning to be free of fear, of limits, and of ideas on how to live, or what to be, and for whom.


When you climb it is all about what is right in front of you. The moment cannot escape you because you literally are face to face with reality, in front of your nose, that rock, and every last move you make has to be a conscious decision, and to be made with such precision. If you look down, to the right, or to the left, you basically become so fear ridden that you feel a paralysis and you cannot move. Not up, not down, just stuck where you are in that moment.


When you are drenched in the moment, there is only the reality of looking at what is in front of you, and glancing at where you are headed, and then right back to focusing on what is in front of you, and what steps are needed to get from point A to point B. The rest really takes care of itself, but the bare Truth is........ that living like this, (if you are not used to it) can seem more stressful than anything else.


We are not taught to stay in the moment. We are taught to plan, and to be secure, and to know what your life plan is.


To be that exact, in the moment, is almost a sort of death to that persona that HAS TO LIVE BY A PLAN, or SOMETHING............ANYTHING..........to go by........... something that will give you a direction, rather than not knowing, and trusting!


I became so in love with Rock Climbing, as it showed me how exquisite, and alive it is, to be free of fear, and to just surrender to the moments that are in your life, whether you are on a cliff, a rock, or sitting in your house, wondering what the hell you are going to do for the rest of your life, let alone, the next year, or month, or even days.


We really don't need to question it at all.


I know that sounds crazy, but when you start to see the glory in what those "moments" bring, you almost CANNOT RETURN to any other way of thinking.


You are not "checked out", you are not in "la la land", and you are not just some free flowin "hippie" who acts like a 60's throw back.


You, in fact, are right on the money, and will probably get more out of life than anyone with so many plans and ideas, that they squelch any sort of surprise, or loveliness that comes with being that PRECISE in their daily living and decisions to FEEL and ACT............in love!


Don't expect, that if you decide to turn a new leaf, that there will be bleachers of people yelling your name in total support of your life. It isn't that way!!! Trust me! You may get a few strays who are hanging along the side lines, but really, bleachers are not part of the "rock climb", nor will there be a team of cheerleaders with pom poms. Go to Net Flix for that........seriously............... probably in the "bad movie section".


The rock climb is an individual experience, and if you have never done it, gear up, and at least get a clue on what may or may not happen. No one likes culture shock!! I know I don't!!




Like I said, "It has been awhile", and for someone that is so used to expressing herself, somehow that has become few and far between with not a lot of spare time, and well, the list of reasons go on.


It always feels good to let go of emotion, whatever it may be, to express what it is that is tugging at you, OR making you feel so whole you can barely stand it.


Life is so full of opportunity to grow, and expand outside of ourselves. I know it may hurt to stretch ourselves, but man, it does make us whole, and wise, and smart, and privy to what "IS", as opposed to what "What seems to be".


I don't know how people do it.......the ones with families, the ones with successful careers, and who have all of their time tied up.


I have a full time job, 4 dogs a cat! To do the "work" that needs to be done, in order to maintain a healthy perspective is overwhelming, and you wonder how you can either save on sleep, or cram more hours into your day, JUST TO KEEP UP, and keep with it all..........to not lose yourself in a world, or time, that doesn't throw out safety nets too easily............... is like a freakin man hunt................no lie!!


Which, I guess can be good, if you have a drive, and a passion, to KNOW...............really know!!!


Hay, I'll be honest, I go in and out.............. but for the most part, truly, I do know that THIS VERY MOMENT IS ALL I HAVE............... and I am curtailing my life to this realization. It may not be easy, and it does take an extreme amount of focus, amongst all else that calls our attention, but it really is worth the time, to cut to the chase............to really understand, who we are, outside of the looks, the title, the job, and any other association that you, or anyone else has, of You!


There is so much more, to us.............so much that it captivates me on a daily basis, and makes me yearn to get closer and closer to what that may mean in my life.


God, I'm coming out of my skin, it is such a turn on to know that we have so many ways to get to "US", AND TO SHARE "US", and to be able to use 'US" in worthwhile ways, that have nothing to do with anything that we are doing, now, everyday............in our mundane lives!


It is something so different................. so quenching................. so damn intoxicating I can barely stand it!


Thank you, to every last soul that teaches me about LOVE, and about LIFE, and how to love THAT MUCH MORE, no matter the circumstance.


I am perplexed, intrigued, and ultimately passionate, to understand all that transpires within the human psyche and heart.


It is a process. One that will never grow old to me.


I am forever indebted to any and all things that make me dig deeper!


Gabriela

LISTEN CAREFULLY

WHEN PEOPLE

SHOW

YOU

WHO

THEY

ARE

BELIEVE THEM!!