WE ALL DIP IN......

......but we also have the choice to DIP OUT!
The mind is a little shit and the first chance it gets it will pack up the van and take you on a joy ride. Who doesn't like joy rides, and that is why it fools us because it gets our adrenalin going and there we are, in the midst of our own movie in our head, riding in the "van" on our joy ride, "excited" as hell, blood pumping through our veins and THIS is what our bodies recognize as FUN. Truly. It's amazing how that whole thing shows up and we totally buy into it. It's such a crock of BS.
I've redefined "fun" in my life and have worked diligently through the years to undo what "fun" means, and what excitement is.
Sometimes I feel as if I am a small child in wonderment, and often times I feel as if I have lived a very full life and am in my 80's, chuckling, saying, " What the hell did I buy into for all of those years?"
I have to take silent breaks away from my everyday norm to look at my life objectively, to see if I am buying "silver coins" or if I am standing firm in my consciousness with a fresh awareness of my actions, my thoughts and how I am moving in the world. Not according to what "should" be or "should not" be, but as a conscious human being, am I moving the way I want according to my own values?
No one is  perfect. We all get the chances, daily, to re-do, re-define, and create our realities the way we want.
I get stuck just like everyone else, but I always try to see what needs to change and ask myself, "what today........ what can I change today to be more in line with my soul's yearning?"
Ya know what? This could be me being lazy and throwing away a plastic bottle into the garbage, knowing full well there is recycling. It doesn't happen often but when it does happen, I stop for a split second and go, "Wow", you are choosing to be lazy right now". I grab it out of the garbage and put it by my door to be put outside. I giggle kinda at my own laziness at times and say to myself lightly, "Give me more consciousness". Like, what the hell......... it's really kinda funny how we just move around so lazy. Honestly. As if we don't have a conscious, or a brain to decipher right from wrong. There's a million things that come to me in a day like that, just for ME, and then you venture out into the big bad world and you see so much. It's as if there is a huge veil over every one's eyes and you almost feel like you are in some Sci-Fi movie with robots moving about, eating candy, staring at their phones, zoning out to music, beeping their horns at people they don't know, cursing because they are angry that you rushed in front of them, I mean it is absolute craziness!!
I feel as if the first part of my life was so intense. I've been intense since I was a young child and that sort of was a curse. I thought and thought and thought and observed till the cows came home. Always reflective and observing behaviors, life, nature and creatures. The whole entire Universe was so sexy to me. So attractive and alluring.
Things haven't changed much and it takes everything for me to remain somewhat in the mainstream of things in "fear" that I will lose the innocence, the gorgeous edge of what is really real for me in this life, and leave all thought to my inner quest. Leave it to whoever or whatever feeds me the consciousness that I am so blessed to have now. The powers of.......... ??
It's like that silly but oh so true old movie called "Ground Hogs Day". We really do get the chance everyday to do things over and over and over again until we get it right. We all make mistakes and that is part of life, but the best is that there is a loving energy that will always be there, and it comes in many forms, to hold your hand, to let you know that you are not alone and that more choices are available to you. More than the old stinky ones you have been trying out but are just old now. Like old socks. Get rid of'em already. There are holes in them, can't you see?
Life is pretty generous.
I feel that. When I am not stuck in my own ideas of how things should go, life throws some pretty amazing curve balls and I laugh at myself when my mouth drops in total surprise. NO!! WHY AM I SURPRISED?
When I trust that I am not the controller, the end all of how life should be run, and I allow a higher power to grab my hand, it gets pretty stellar and then.......... then my mouth drops and I am like............. WHOA!  How did I do that again? And then I want to do it again, and again, just to see if it works more than once. HAHAHHA!! It does damn it! I've relied on this trust for 30 years. It's never proved me wrong. When my little self gets in the way though, it ruins it all. It's a God consciousness that infuses you with the will to truck on. Don't give in to whatever it is that your brain drums up.
It so reminds me of a friend who is a quadriplegic. He couldn't move out of his chair, could only use his arms sparingly, and was in a wheel chair 24/7. He was more capable than many people I know who are fully capable. His willingness to live and to beat all odds, mentally and physically drew me like a magnet. He was and is such an inspiration for all of us who have gotten the divine opportunity to work on his body, to feed him, bath him, work him out, and just hang with an individual who was a gorgeous surfer dude from California who got in a terrible car accident and it changed his life. He, to this day, is one of my biggest inspirations.
You cannot allow ANY OBSTACLE to stand in your way. No matter what it is, there is a way to rise above any affliction, with the trust and love and courage to WANT TO HEAL, to want to change and beat all odds.
The people that inspire me are the ones who throw all ideas out of the window and they do any and everything to achieve the desired goal. When it comes to that intensity, the rule book can stay on the night stand but the source of all sources is the thing that will plummet you to the heights of where you thought or think you could never go or reach.
Take a side road. Just check it out. It doesn't have to be any one person's way. Just your way, whatever is comfortable for you. Get inspired to work outside of the box. To live in the fullest way that you can that will take you out of fear, out of any thought that will keep you stuck, and not feeling totally alive in your beautiful skin.
I'm so inspired myself, tonight. I feel like jumping up and down.
Sometimes it just takes getting a little quiet. Put down the computer or TV or music. Get away from the norm and visit with yourself, silently. It may feel uncomfortable at first but trust me, it's like sitting with a good friend who you haven't seen in a really long time. Once you break the ice, YOU ARE IN HEAVEN. You start laughing, and forgetting about all of the so called "problems" that you have and you just revel in the beauty of the moment, with your "friend". Your best friend, called YOU! ~