TIMES ARE CHANGIN

It has been so, so long since I have written. My life has gotten so compartmentalized, and time seems to be next to nill.
Change is happening in the most beautiful ways, and there has been nothing more glorious than remembering how staying in this precise moment gives a birth and a death to so much in my life.

It gives me great relief to know that I don't have to entertain my thoughts past this moment. Call me crazy, but it works.
I'm not saying that planning isn't a part of my life, but things are ever changing and it almost becomes this sort of laugh off in a way. And the funny part is, it's ME against ME. How funny it all is.

I have  met someone who has brought such joy into my life!

It is so many things........ to use regular words almost dilutes the beauty, the brilliance, the charm, the purity and the sacredness of it all.

When I have ample time to actually sit...... to empty myself onto this white page, that somehow is calling my name more than ever now..........I will begin my story...........

If I could write in beautiful calligraphy to somehow exemplify my beating heart and all of it's emotions, I would! I would find the exact pen and the perfect paper, and with the softness of my hand, slowly writing down the most amazing journey that has begun, all within this last year.

I may not have the paper, I may not have the pen, but the calligraphy will be spelled out in a perfume of letters that will satiate me, at least for now, on here.

I found it somewhat difficult to start writing when I haven't written in so long, so bare with me. I do miss all of you, and my connection to you via this blog.
It has been the most amazing vehicle for me and has given me so much to be grateful for, more so than I ever realized. I have many plans ahead........... this blog has ignited so much inside.

I will keep you posted and in the loop.

and..........

Uncle Dick............ you are here with me, and I will catch you up.
Your letters me the world to me and are more and more sacred to me everyday.

I love all of you so much!

With great gratitude,
Gabriela

DEVOTIONAL PRACTICE

I don't know where this blog will take me tonight. I knew that I needed to sit and write, and as always, there are a million things to write about, so little time, and every once in awhile I glance over at the clock and say, "Shit..... it's late, I can't write tonight.......".

There are always so many things to do, to accomplish, dogs to attend to and such.....

I'm not obsessed with having things done in a timely manner, yet, I do love to be productive, and don't have an investment in checking things off on my to do list, at least I hope not after years and years of condensing my should and shouldn'ts into a big trash can that I set on fire, to set ablaze ideas that just don't need to be with me any longer.

I am in a major state of awe tonight for so many reasons.

I found a gift in my box at work tonight. It was a CD from a friend. A Christmas gift. So surprising and lovely.
I took it home with me tonight and have been listening to it since I  have gotten home.
I love the fact that listening to this music brings me closer to my friend, but not only that, connects me to her soul, the one that I knew was ablaze when we met. The CD also has reminded me of who I am, what I love, and the tenderness of Truth. How incredibly pure it all is and how it is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING in my life. It IS MY LIFE!

It is very rare that I go out of  my way to spend time with people. I get enough of people at work , which is such a blessing for me in so many gorgeous ways, but at the end of the night, I cradle the moments that I will be home, with my animals, in silence........no noise, no hustle...........just simple......simple.......simple!

I have an extremely private life, and when I do venture out to spend time with people, it is going to be because you equal special in my life.
That may sound fa fi fa, as my sister and I call it. I am not pompous in any way shape or form, just very specific with my time, who, what, and where's.........
I don't have a lot of time and so I want my spare time to be laden with goods.......pure goods that will sustain my energy and elevate people.

I know what that equates for me. It's a pretty simple formula, yet it is potent beyond belief.

I have been experiencing so many things that almost have no words to describe the enormity of it all.

It is a huge disappointment for the writer in me who NEEDS to find the right words to express this crazy, crazy love that I am experiencing, but not for the soul who just GETS IT and is fine with WHAT IS!

I have come to realize, more and more, how my devotional practice dictates my moments, my hours, my days, my every, every, every thing.

It affects my decisions, my relationships, my "plans" for where I might be headed.......I mean really, there are a ton of things.

There are things that come at us from all directions, pulling us to go one way or the other.

I find that when I am connected to who I am inside, and am OK with letting ideas go, not glomming onto them, that I soar to heights that baffle the sh...........outa me!

Right now, I cannot seem to articulate what it truly is that I am experiencing, and it IS a lot.

Remnants of my past make me learn and grow and keep me current on so many things.

Then you meet the person that you have missing all of this time, and you wonder how God can be so darn gracious!

How will it all be orchestrated?

Again, I close my eyes........

It is none of my business!

I don't want to know, to be honest.

The glory of my days are reveling in the moment and letting life unfold in all of it's glory.

I completely trust this process. So much so that I have to take several "God" breaks to check in with myself to see if I have actually gone to heaven, or if it is actually "heaven" that I am living in............modern day........ serious........... seizing my moments so much so that God is  using me in the biggest of ways, to live out this life in the most conducive and genuine ways.

He is bringing me the people, revealing the places, and at the same time, tickling me to death, reminding me of how fleeting this all is!

How it will all be gone in a flash.

I have a responsibility to myself.

That responsibility is to stay true to myself.

In staying true to myself, I bring about change.

I bring a fierce consciousness to the table that needs to be gulped up.

I need quiet to digest what it is that I need to be doing in order to make that consciousness come to life, and to make it a reality.

I don't sneeze at any of my visions.

They are real, thought out, and  precise.

I am a warrior that will fight for what I believe in.

There is so much to be done..........

I rest in the knowing that I am one that will accomplish the things that need to be done in order to promote happiness, growth, change, and transformation.

How that will show up for me is always a surprise, and too, a luxury.

I bow in sheer gratitude for the allowance to live in a life that is so free.

How lucky am I to be able to write this blog, so freely....... to say whatever it is that I want and send it out into the ether's..... my own thoughts........ unedited............with no expectations............just a free love............. sharing it's grandeur............

I'm overwhelmed, to say the least.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, for this life.............for my very existence...........for being born into such a complex world that has challenged me enough to question so many things, to keep me alive, so very much alive........

never stale.....I swear.......

God is so good to me!

I court my God ..............

I forever court my God........

I will forever open his door, send him flowers, write him poetry, swing him around, dancing freely.............

My smile is will always be big.......... greeting him with open arms.......... sharing my tender heart.......

because

I love............ really............... just love..........period!

It is the one thing that I can be sure of.............for myself............

that my love will never run dry............

it is an oasis.........

and so  unexplainable

that I must just finish this sentence

and go..........

I never want to water down this love.

~

GOING THROUGH THE EMOTIONS.....

BUT....

Being objective!

It is hard these days to find a spot where we can actually sit back in a recliner and touch the remote, to our own lives, to be able to watch from an objective place, and to be able to view things as they are, which to me, is a movie.

It takes a diligence, and a willingness to want to know something beyond what seems to be.

My life is changing at a rapid rate, yet, when I really look at it, it is moving in succession with what has been asked for, by me, and as long as I keep up to snuff, and am honest with what it is that I have asked for, and acknowledge the gifts in what is presented, I will be sailing on a huge boat of happiness.

There are so many details in my life right now, so many significant signs, so many gifts from God that I want to sit for hours upon  hours to tell you, in all of it's glory, how it is changing me, and strengthening my core, and opening me up to places that are devoid of ideas. Did I say devoid of ideas??? I think so. Can I say that again........DEVOID OF IDEAS!

Today I found myself saying that, "Even my own reality is blowing me away".

I don't usually say that about my life. I am so used to it being very eclectic in it's way, and somehow find myself giggling at the absurdity of it all, but these days, I'm goin" , "Holy Crap".......WTF.........

Situations and events present themselves and I find myself listening deeply to the intuition that I most love, and trust implicitly.

It's so wild how I have come so acute and privy to the workings of my inner world.

It really isn't anything that complex. It is ever changing and if I don't stay abreast it will take me on a ride to hell, and I will be that typical American that says, "Why me?". I ain't going for that stuff.......I'm sorry!!!!

Take responsibility. I have to take responsibility for my feelings, my emotions, my reactions and know that it has nothing to do with anyone else but myself. If I dare blame anyone else, I am setting myself up for some fierce disappointment.

I had a long day today. I was off, but had to get up for a court appointment, which turned out incredible, in my favor........that is always good..........

and then I came home and started doing all of the things I love to do, and honestly felt like I had a piece of heaven sliced for me and put on a silver platter.

I had a million and one thoughts and I said to myself, "When I write my blog, I will spill the beans". But really it has to come when the time is ripe. There is so much to convey and being rushed or with little time just doesn't make it for a good story, or at least, enough to be present to the point I like to tell a true, good love laden story.

I will have to catch you up little by little.

I feel as if my life has changed 200%. All good, and rewarding to say the least.

I am in love, without a doubt.

How's that for a one liner.

Chew on that, and don't, don't inundate me with the who, what, where, and how's.

You know I will spoon feed you.

If I kept it from you it would be too weird.

God is good to me, and answers all of my prayers.

Good things come to those who deserve it.

I would have never said this about myself, but I will now.

I DESERVE GREAT, GREAT LOVE.

And......I am getting it.

Thank you heavens above!

I love you all and thank you for being patient with me not writing consistently.


I am here.......experiencing life, like everyone......digesting.......and marching forward in very high ways.

Thank you for supporting my blog, and for loving me in all the ways that you do.

Tons of love and warmth,
Gabriela

HATE TO SOUND SO CLICHE"....

JUST

DO

IT!

QUIT

TALKING

ABOUT

IT

AND

JUST

DO

IT!

~

REMAINING STILL..........

n

STAYING TRUE

If staying true to yourself
meant
risking
"it all"
what would
that
"ALL"
BE?

Is it
just
this
or that
or is it
really
the
"ALL".

Is staying
true
trepidation?

You either
risk
or
you
don't.

You can't
jump
and
in
mid
air
want to put
one foot
back
on land.

You either
say
yes
and
free fall
or
you
are
not
yet
ready.

Either one
is OK.

just
naming
it
is
the
free fall.

I'm
on
the
edge.

Love
just
can't
seem
to
hold
me
down.

~

THERE ARE PEOPLE THAT WANT...........

........people that don't realize that they want things from you. They think it is genuine love, and concern, but it isn't. It is a wanting that shows up.
There is no need to want from me.
I am only here to give love..............
not anything else............. I am not here for anything else...........  unless I tell you otherwise.

Please, do not make my genuine love into something that it is not!!!

I am not a flirt, someone that needs to say things for a reaction. I tell it like it is, and if you happen to misinterpret, that is your thing.............

I genuinely am here to spread and share love, not to play a game, or lead you in some stray direction for some self absorbed reason. I'd rather shoot myself, in all honesty!

I get countless comments via email ...........they blow me away.

I am me............Gabriela...................a regular person..............not this "thing", or untouchable........... I am here, just like you..doin' my work.
I am not the "thing" you think I am.
I am regular.
Just like you.

I have done some extensive work and it has been incredible......

but know........... I am still...........and always will be........... a work in progress..........and never will be.........anything less..............

There are those that have very specific opinions about me.........and you should know that I am right there with you...doing my regular work........... hashing out the same things that need work in order for us to move forward........

I am not better, or greater, or anything like that..............

I am simply me.........with the same questions, the same fervor, the same insatiable desire to know what the hell is going on here..........

So please, humbly, do  me this favor........don't categorize me as something special, someone that has something that you don't, because I have what you have............and that is LOVE!

Look within to see what you have that is going to take you to the higher.........

I am always here to support higher consciousness, but not to make any assumption that I am someone or something that will take you to where you need to be.

That is your own trek.

It is all individual.

I am here, just like you, discovering my own individual ride.

I will hold your hand, but I am no means, the teacher.

A friend......... and a supporter..............but nothing greater.

Thank you for the ability to express!

~