I AM SO IN LOVE

Easy does it........... I'm not THAT easy!

C'mon, ya'll should know me by now! I don't think those words have made it to my blog YET.

In love!

Those words are very hard to come by. But if I share it from the context of what I am about to share with you, then, you will notice, from my blog, what IN LOVE, means to me, and has always meant to me, at least first and foremost. Anything after that has either been icing on the cake, or a great thought, maybe, even a fantasy in my head, and then it didn't meet up to what I had thought, naturally. A huge blog, right there, but we will save that for another time. Remind me, it's a good one!

I don't know, I may be starting to sound like the proverbial "hippie" or the peace/love child these days, or more even, but my truths, really, are my truths, and I just say it like I feel it, and then, people can do what they may with it. Like it, or not like it, throw it away, roll their eyes, and say,"Oh, that's Gabby." She and her Patchouli! OK, so deem me a hippie, love child.
I'M ALL OVER IT! You wanna deem me somethin? Go ahead and deem me that! I'll be a proud woman.

So, why, is Gabriela in love? And with whom? And how, all of a sudden?

Well, let me tell you..........4 score and................. about 38 years ago, I was laying on our lawn, in the front yard, at out house in New Jersey. I was sprawled out, legs and arms wide open, and just fixated on the clouds in the sky.

I layed there, breathless, and truly.......... I remember being baffled by the mystery of those clouds. It was quiet, like tonight, little bugs making their noises, and sounds from nature that, I still wonder, what the heck they were, and man..............just exquisite quietude. Really.........at that young age, I was, where I am, exactly tonight..........so frigin in awe of the silence, the enormity of what is offered to us, the amazing beauty, the sounds, the whole kitten caboodle!!

I used to stare at the clouds for so long that I wanted to find pictures in them, just to stay a bit longer. I asked the same questions to myself, out loud, as I do now, when I look up, and there it is, that big ol' sky, that consistent sky that shows me gorgeousness, even if it isn't the same picture in the sky every night.........I like change, and consistency. If they can make it in the same room, and get along, there is a winner there.

Such is the sky!

I come home and have made it a plan to take 30 minutes to myself, or more, lately more, to just sit, come down off of my day, and do nothing, even if there are a million and one things to do. I go outside, and sit out on the deck, and check it all out. The sky, the trees, the birds, the goats, the lake, my life, my body, where IT is at, my centeredness, if it is, or if it's not, I mean I get down to the details of what my body even wants, whether IT feels acid or alkaline......and move from there. Don't laugh.... it works, if you are on that page, and actually WANT IT to work for you.

Ahh, that is just me, and my fascination for the body and how it is all integrated, but nonetheless, I check everything out. Does that make me a saint or "sinner?" NAAAAAA! Just mildly aware, and hoping for more of that awareness thing along the way.

I came home and did my little nap thing, which wasn't really, a nap. It's more like a relaxed introspective time. I had my CD on. Piano concerto, and a symphony that would blow your whole idea out of the water of what "symphony" actually means.

I layed there as if someone had given me a nice feeling drug.

When there is that connection, to something else, rather than "me", it IS, as if, I have been drugged, and have been floating in this reality of good, of love, and of comfort, ease, and no worry.

Not only that, I layed there, and as I turned my head, my focus turned toward a huge pot of flowers I had just planted, and they were there, and the backdrop, the lake, and a few sailboats, and the ripples of the water, and my consciousness just soaked it up like a sponge, and emptied itself into a place of, what I think, reality, truly is!! ( did I put an explanation point there?)

Good, cuz it warrants many!

The flowers were flickering in the wind, the music was euphoric, and any kind of worry or anything, really, that I had been thinking of, was completely gone, and I was transported to a place that I AM SO IN LOVE with.

Sorry, it wasn't about any ONE. It could heighten by a thousand, if a someone was there, actually getting it............. without words, without anything to say, and maybe never even talked about, but inside, no question.............

The music, the scene, me, and no wants, just love, if you want to deem it that, happening, and me, experiencing what I call.........LIFE!

It is hard to imagine, at this moment, to go back to any kind of life, with someone, who DID NOT GET that way of being.

I would rather be alone, forever, than to experience an emptiness, that did not compliment, or share something that was so inherant, with someone.

I am picky these days.

Who knows, you might have to be wearing Musk Oil, with feathers on your headband.............. whatever it takes............just find that place inside. If you have no interest, I say what a good friend of mine says who works on Wall Street............"NO BOND BABY, NO BOND!"

Go find a feather, or a star, or some ray of sunshine that will build your character, and make you some pretty darn good friends, as well.

I'm not gonna say it, but................. you'll know it.............

All my love,
Patchouli an' all............

Gabriela