ALONENESS

That is one word that can stray off onto so many different subjects. Funny, just one word, and how it can create so many different meanings or perceptions.

Being or wanting to be alone, does not necessarily mean feeling lonely, or depressed.

Being alone has always been my best friend, something that has nurtured my soul and given me time to reflect on what is or has been happening for me in my life.

Even as a kid, I gravitated toward being alone.

I'd go make a fort, or get my tent, and ask mom if I could camp out in the back yard, under the stars. My room seemed so confining. Plus it didn't have the blazing stars above.

Maybe some people are afraid to be alone. They could be afraid of what they might think, that they actually may like it, and then what happens to the supposed relationships , or friends, or whatever usually occupies their time? What would actually happen in an extended period of time, BEING ALONE WITH ONE SELF?? HMMM!?

As time goes by, I want, more and more, to have that time alone. Not in noisy places. I work in a noisy place all day, why would I want to continue that on for another few hours?

Don't get me wrong, every once in awhile I love a good dance, although that has been years, or just some outside noise that I don't have to be the hostess to, or entertain, in some way. Just be a background figure somehow. That, I like, maybe listening to some good music with someone cool. Love having good friends over for great food, wine and tons of laughing............ gotta have that!

Don't ever apologize for wanting more and more alone time, if that is what you need or want.

You have to understand, most people don't want to be alone, just the general definition of the word, it scares the hell out of people. ALONE......IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG? ARE YOU OK?

Now, there is being alone, and then there is BEING ALONE!

Some people think being alone is reading a book on your night off, and petting your animal, not answering the phone and having a good night to yourself.

Love it, that's great!!! Can't think of anything better.

Now what about, on your next night off, and your next day or next 3 days off, or a week or god, amp that up to a month or several months. How do you feel now?

LONELY? SAD? DEPRESSED?

OR...

ALIVE, FULL, REJUVENATED, MORE CONSCIOUS AND AWARE, RESTED, CUP FILLED, REBIRTH, SENSUAL BEYOND BELIEF, ( and not even having to do with sex)........ hmmmmm! Imagine that? All of those things and more, ALLLLLLLLLLLL BYYYYYYY YOURSELF?!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER? Oh, yea, depressed....yup.......... lonely, she needs me, needs a friend, or a partner, or some social activity............SHE JUST NEEDS TO GET THE HELL OUT!

HAHAH, I do get to laugh, because why would someone know the benefits of being THAT ALONE, when, really, they probably never even ventured out to see what it is like to begin with.

More than likely because, WHERE, in society, do they teach you to spend time alone???

Everyone is teaching you to go buy the best lingerie, get the best make-up, go buy Abercrombie, or whatever your fashion labels are, and sport them for your beaux or your girl, and get on that Face book, hurry ...quick cuz you might miss a drink sent to you, or some gift delivered via Face book. Hurry, you have 92 notifications that need to be answered.........AND BY TONIGHT PLEASE...........PEOPLE ARE WAITING!

Then you get the person who dips into all that, here and there, but prefers the aloneness thing, and everyone gets concerned all of a sudden because you are NOT THE "NORM."

It's been umpteen consecutive days that you are alone, don't ya wanna come play?? MMM, maybe soon, but soon never really comes, if there is a preference, and no guilt to tag along with it.

There is a divine gift in spending time alone, away from all of the things that you normally do, to be a little rebel and take a detour to check out what is alive in your soul, other than your 9-5.

Who are you outside of all of that, or your house, or your kids, your wife, your husband or partner, or your daily chores?

WHO ARE YOU REALLY? AND DO YOU LIKE WHAT YOU SEE AND FEEL WHEN YOU ARE ALONE?

Please give yourself time to check YOU out! It is the most incredible gift I have ever given to myself, aside from my Louis Vuitton, hahahaha. Hadn't laughed in a few paragraphs, had to trip myself up real quick!

Look, we are always going to have entertainment. The industry showers us with endless ways for us NOT TO BE BORED. It is like candy. So, don't worry. If you feel like you are getting bored, just snag any one of your gadgets. I'm sure it will be right there, handy as can be, ready for you to google, or twit, or post, or text. Whatever it may be, it will be available to you, so if in fear, take your gadget along with you on your alone day, JUST YOU, and let me know how you feel.

Try not to cheat. Give yourself permission to access that part of you that is probably more thirsty than you could imagine. You will be so surprised at how good of a time you can have with JUST YOURSELF.

I do all the time, and I cut loose!

I laugh, dance, sing, write, have good cry's, tons of innocent moments that would never be found with company, and an inner experience that I would never trade for the world.

Actually, it gets so intoxicating that it scares me to a small degree. Wondering if I dip in too, too much, will I ever actually want to come out.

That is part of my puzzle these days.

"To BE or not to BE",

THAT IS THE QUESTION!!!