ANGELIC MOMENTS

I am going to start out by saying, "This is not meant to be morose, or depressing, in the least. On the contrary, very uplifting, very mystical, and so, so angelic. We get to see how God works, whether we believe in that or not.

I believe in a lot of things. Serendipity, Karma, being at the right place, in the right time....there are no coincidences. I truly believe that.

I'll try to make a long beautiful, heart felt story, short.

My mom was in the ICU unit for 7 weeks.

She went in for bladder surgery, and really, never made it out. But in the meantime, I flew home, and hadn't been home for 3 years prior, for several reasons.

I got the call after mom went in for surgery. You need to come home! I will never forget taking in the information, going numb, and heading for the shower to "wake up", so to speak.

Every thought ran through my head. I knew. And I couldn't wrap myself around the fact that she was going to be gone, sooner than later. No one actually said that, but that was the energy and the intuition of the moment.

That shower, that night, will stand out, for the rest of my waking years. Your whole life streams before you, from when you remember taking baths, and mom scrubbing your back, to school lunches, to bed time stories, to private moments that were so sacred, only to be shared by mother and daughter.

I went from the airport to the ICU unit with my sister, who I hadn't seen in two years, aside from picking me up, at the airport, to see mom.

Several years of stuff, came to a screeching halt, and there we were, silently acknowledging that our mom was going to pass at any time. It was way too much to wrap myself around.

I am going to cut to the chase, because from here on out, it gets involved and too intricate to share.

The one night that my sister and I decided to go home and not stay in the ICU unit, we get a call that we need to come right away, that my mother needed to be intubated Again, and they needed our permission to do that again. It is a very intricate procedure, and is a major timing factor.

We got there as soon as we could, but they had already done what they needed to do, with the timing and circumstances that they had.

All along, there was a nurse that was checking in on mom, making her laugh, and knew the in's and outs of her room, in ICU, her status, and all of the nurses that were on duty there.

This night, if I am correct, she was NOT assigned to that floor, but somehow, was given the duty to that floor, or room, I'm not sure how it worked.

When we got there, the nurse on duty had already intubated her, and basically saved her life.

Cutting to the chase, unfortunately, because it is the greatest story to be told, the nurse that was on "duty" that saved her life, was my BEST FRIEND FROM JUNIOR HIGH. I didn't recognize her previously, probably because I was so wrapped up in the reality of what was happening. I just didn't notice her, and, she looked completely different, although, once we connected, I can't believe I missed her.

This is someone I used to cheat off of, ask her for answers, laugh crazy about life stuff, meet at our lockers for small talk, gossip and just to be there for one another. It didn't matter. I loved her like crazy, and she was always amazing to me. We lost touch after going to high school and such, but I had never forgotten her, in my head. She was an integral part of my childhood, figuring out stuff, being OK with myself, my jaded humor, and she was just cool. My perspective was as deep then, as it is now.

After finding out who she was, we got the chance to connect, as my Mom was in the ICU unit, and until she died, Cheryl was with me, until the very last moment. I will never forget her, compassion, her insight, her words of love, and of service to me, as I embarked on something that I never figured would come my way till way later on in life when I had "time to think about it".

It was all so hurried. No time to think about anything.

I watched my mom pass over many hours of being on morphine. The whole process gave me my doctorate in science, mythology, grace, god, and the crazy mysteries of how this life supposedly works.

The moment that she passed, Cheryl was there, holding my hand. I felt her there, guiding the process, as this is what she does, on a daily basis, for people,everyday, and here we were, novice to the whole scenario.

I cannot possibly wrap up what had transpired. It was/is all too much for me to wrap myself around.

It was the most ANGELIC MOMENT, of my life. To have someone that you were so close to, and felt so safe with, be in the care of your mother, who was ready to pass.

There is a quiet revelation that I haven't quite gotten, but thoughts, visuals, and premonitions engulf my reality, and somewhere in there, is an answer, that maybe, just maybe, doesn't have to be answered. Just acknowledged.

There are Angels in our lives. Probably, more so than we realize.

We need to start looking out for the signs. There are great messages, and fine gifts to uncover.

I am ever so grateful for my angel, Cheryl, who stood by me, in my most vulnerable time of my life, and for connecting with me, in the most pure way, to allow me to accept one of the most blazing realities of life...........DEATH...........and to help me embrace that with a lightness, and a clarity, that only takes someone special, to convey, and really, not just convey, but to trust, and feel safe that what is being shared is genuine.

Cheryl, you are genuine, and your being there for me, at one of the most poignant times of my life, is beyond appreciation, and I will always be connected to your sweet, sweet heart.

I love you, for all of the beautiful ways that you share yourself, with me and with the world.

Always,
Gabriela aka, to you, Joni